1. Boys wouldn’t smell.
Like do you remember how after lunch your freshman year you’d walk back into the main building and it stank like sweat
and dirt (despite the fact that dirt has no distinct smell)? Okay well a lot of boys continue to find a way to smell bad (there
are a select few who don’t okay, like I opt to not hang out with smelly boys.). Here I thought that as we aged, application of
deodorant would become more common.
2. I still haven’t found anyone who is like me.
Okay so my aunt told me once that in high school everyone tries to be one way (so that’s why my friends weren’t like me
cause I was different) and that when I got to college I was going to meet so many awesome people that were just like me (I
still have yet to find anyone who hates what I hate and likes to do what I like to do (though I do have a handful of friends
(okay so I have like three friends and that’s including my dog but that’s not the point)). (In fact, have i mentioned that I
actually made only 1/2 a friend when I moved away to my first college of (terrible) choice? (see I could not even find one
person to be my friend))
3. I would start to read adult fiction.
I’m a big reader, like I used to constantly have my nose in a book (I say used to because when netflix came into my life a
year ago i started getting hooked on shows and movies and binge watching instead of reading (but I am still big on
reading)) and when I was younger (middle school) I liked reading mysteries. I grew out of those and became a reader of
standard young adult fiction. I read and still do read everything with a cover and a good sypnopsis (Yeah I literally do judge
an actual book by its cover) and I thought maybe when I got out of high school I would get bored of young adult fiction and
move on to the big leagues (I was becoming an adult I needed to read adult books!), buuuuut I didn’t, or still haven’t (a
young adult paperback is like eight bucks, and adult fiction paperback is FIFTEEN! FIFTEEN!!! (plus reading a book where
the character is twice my age bores me half to death I can’t help it)).
4. I’ll be able to take whatever classes my little heart desires.
Apparently colleges follow stupid, strict degree plans (so even if you are majoring in biology and want to take that cool
creative writing class you heard about to satisfy your english credit, YOU CAN’T cause did they mention that any english
would satisfy your credit EXCEPT the one you really want to take? (DID THEY meNTION THAT???)).
5. Boys would start to like me.
(Okay this one is embarrassing. (like really embarrassing)) I was under the impression that all high school boys are little turds
who just want to get into girls pants and that I was going to leave high school (thus leaving the friend zone behind) and I
was going to transform into this awesome (as in more awesome than I already was) person and everyone’s (like boys, not
girls) eyes were going to open and realize that I was the girl of their dreams and that anyone would be lucky to have me and
they wanted to be that lucky guy. If only right? Unfortunately, i don’t get a second look (or hardly a look at all really, unless I
happen to be staring off into the distance and accidentally be gazing creepily at someone the whole time without realizing it
which is when they usually do give me a look (but the creeped out kind where they wonder why you were staring at them the
whole time)) from anyone much less a boy. In fact I have remained in the zone where boys don’t like you but they don’t not
like you so at least I’m in a safe zone (sounds like friend zone but much different cause in a friend zone you are
acknowledged but in the safe zone, no one knows you’re there).
So you know, like everyone, I had some misconceptions about college life (there are many more of course, (like the one where I thought being smart and killing myself to get good grades would get my education paid for but in fact my mom makes too much money (though not enough to pay for my school out of pocket or anything) for me to get any aid (but this is another one of my endless rants which I’d rather save for later)) but has that ever happened where you can’t think of anything when you’re supposed to? yeah that’s me) and these misconceptions were, well, misconceptions. But maybe, hopefully, in the next two years of my college career, boys will remember to put on deodorant and I’ll transition into adult novels (though highly unlikely because when I just think of doing that I get bored).
Unfortunately, I’ll have to remain on my degree plan and college will still suck (sorry I am so negative…).