I’m at this point again.
My two (or so) weeks of nothing have come to a very unfortunate halt. And summer classes start tomorrow. So, as expected(?), here I am blogging about it (because hello!! yet another semester has come by and I’m still attending school meaning I have yet to skyrocket to fame). It is currently 1:22am (despite the fact that I told myself I was going to bed two and a half hours ago (this is why YouTube should be illegal)) and I am laying in my bathtub eating leftover spaghetti and writing this and don’t ask me how I’m doing it (and I know..it’s kinda gross (and unhealthy to be eating so late but this is why I would never make it as a nutritionist (I’m telling myself that it’s okay because I’m going running tomorrow morning (good excuse right???)))), but I’m obviously doing it.
This going back to school thing is always such a bittersweet affair. On an upside, I’m back to a consistently the same schedule (which I (i think) have mentioned that I like). And on the downside school stress is one of the worst stresses there is…and on another upside, these classes are only getting me closer to graduating (ARE YOU SPEAKING TO A SPRING 2016 GRAD RIGHT NOW??? stay tuned to find out (aka subscribe))….and okay there are no more downsides!
TODAY AS I WAS RUNNING around campus (as in I was on my daily jog/run/exercise), I came to the realization that I love my university!! And though I have yet to tell you the full story of my rise, fall, rise again, and fall again story of my first semester of college, I think I have fully gotten past the “I Am a Failure” complex. It sounds as if I’ve had it this whole time, as if I was still in the first stage of grief over the death of the Texas A&M Aggie that (never) was me, but really, I’ve been over it a while. It was just that today (of all days, it’s an odd one given that school is taking away my summer beginning tomorrow), I had an I LOVE MY SCHOOL moment. And I’ve never had one. It has always just been school.
People talk down to it because it’s a hometown university. And everyone here is just dyiiiinnnggg for a chance to get out. And while I do not at all hate my hometown, I will admit that at one point I wanted to leave (only because I thought that’s what you did when you graduated high school, moved away). And not saying that I’m staying here forever, but today (despite the fact that I am now sporting 16 angry red welts courtesy of the Texas mosquitos) as I weaved around the buildings of the university, I realized (once again, cause I have so realized this before) that it’s not the bad place everyone thinks it is. In fact, and I’ll scream it from the rooftops, I LOVE SCHOOL.
I LOVE GOING TO CLASS AND LISTENING TO MY PROFESSORS TALK. I LOVE WRITING PAPERS AT 2AM WHILE I COMPLAIN ABOUT HATING THEM. I LOVE DOING HOMEWORK FOR HOURS AND READING STACKS AND STACKS OF BORING ARTICLES AND THESE CAPS LOCK WORDS ARE EXCITEMENT NOT SARCASM. THIS IS NOT EVEN SARCASM.
But at my school especially. I like bumping into twenty million people from high school a day and the awkward hi-how-are-you encounters that accompany. I like how the lights on the shaded sidewalk turn on at 8:45 every night. And having to walk to the front of the arts and humanities building because the side stairwells are 7 times outta 10 locked. And even though I’m allergic and hate them, I like the three trillion cats that roam around like they own the place.
And there’s probably twenty million other things I could tell you about but now it’s almost 2AM and I said I was going to sleep hours ago (and I’m thinking you can tell that it’s 2AM from the state of love-drunkness of these paragraphs (okay and plus I really need to shampoo my hair)).